Jerry Seinfeld - What They Don’t Teach You at Comedy School

Maybe it was the fear in the MC’s eyes and the panicked cracking of his voice that finally convinced me to leave the stage. Anyway, there was no way I was getting the act back on track, so I just shrugged and walked off.

The audience was still applauding for me while the club’s bouncer and bartender hustled me out of the club and around the block.

I said, "What the hell is going on here? This guy throws a glass and I get thrown out! If he throws a table, does he get to manage the club?"

It was explained to me that the glass thrower was a gangster, a hit man for the Mob. Nobody wanted to throw him out, so I had to go instead.

A few months later, Joe Piscopo dealt with the same guy from the stage. The thug grabbed Joe and broke his nose. A few hours later Joe returned from the hospital with his face all bandaged up, only to find this mobster still sitting in his seat enjoying the show.

I went on to have a TV show. Joe starred on Saturday Night Live. Obviously, this guy had an eye for talent.

© 2006 BY JERRY SEINFELD. FROM I KILLED: TRUE STORIES OF THE ROAD FROM AMERICA’S TOP COMICS BY RITCH SHYDNER AND MARK SCHIFF, PUBLISHED BY CROWN BOOKS