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Magazine

School Jokes

Conicidence

A little boy in my infant class came into school and told me he could spell his mum’s name.

“M-U-M,” he said proudly. Before I could congratulate him, another little boy said... read more


Curse correction

After stepping out for a few minutes from the Grade 1 classroom where I teach, I returned to a chorus of children tattling: “Brendan said the B-word! Brendan said the B-word!”

... read more


Stick-to-it-iveness

I am the principal of an elementary school. One day a bigger boy was brought into my office for discipline. He had hit two kindergarten classmates on the playground and knocked them down.
... read more


Lumps and bumps

Saving for a new car on a teacher’s salary takes a while, so in the meantime I borrowed a friend’s old car that was so beat up, even its dents had dents. I came out of school one day to find a... read more


Typecast

When a teacher asked my six-year-old nephew why his handwriting wasn’t as neat as usual, he responded, “I’m trying a new font.”


Cold comfort

The air-conditioning in my high school civics class was less than ideal. Everyone who sat in the back would freeze, while everyone in the front would roast.

One day, somebody in the... read more


One age fits all

A woman was shopping for something to wear to her 50th high school reunion when a group of teenage girls came into the same shop to try on dresses for their school formal.

“Gross,”... read more


Check mate

When my sister was in high school, she went out with the captain of the chess team. My parents loved him because they figured any guy who took three hours to make a move was OK.


Act natural

Matt's dad picks him up from school. Knowing the parts for the school play were chosen that day, he asks his son if he got a role.

Matt announces: "Yes, I play a man who's been... read more


Cyber dick

I enrolled in an online school to become a private investigator. I gave them my money, and then I never heard back from them. I thought: Either I just got ripped off, or this is my first case.


School of life

A woman walked with her young child to school. When she got there, she heard the teacher whisper to another, “That child looks like a dog!” Outraged, the woman told the teacher she was going to... read more

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