RDAU_2026-ISSUE0809_DIGITAL MAGAZINE

For Bounty Motel bookings, please email stay@bountymotel.co.nz and include the promo code JIREHPASSPORT to receive a 20% discount. *Terms & Conditions: Offer subject to availability. The 20% discount applies to room rates only. This promotion cannot be combined with any other offers. Valid until 31 December 2026. BOUNTY MOTEL bountymotel.co.nz Bay of Island AUCKLAND CITY HOTEL achhobson.co.nz Auckland CBD NOA HOTEL noahotel.co.nz Auckland Newmarket TOM WINDEKNECHT/GETTY IMAGES Massachusetts asked the public to recom- mend a new state motto to replace “By the sword we seek peace, but peace only under liberty.” A date to announce a winner has not been decided, but we’d be fine with any of these submissions: ) “Witch-free since 1693” ) “Massachusetts: We Made Your CEO” ) “In Cod We Trust” ) “The Gateway to New Hampshire” ) Massachusetts: Providing Spelling Bee Fodder for the Ages —mass.gov Last night, my friend changed all my con- tacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn’t upset me at all. —textsfromlastnight.com Confined to a hospital room following my open-heart surgery, I had nothing to do but read or watch TV. After a week, I was bored and miserable. When my doctor stopped by on his rounds, he asked, “How’s it going?” “Honestly, I’m depressed,” I said. He nodded under- standingly and advised, “Stop watching the news.” —David Elton Lewisburg, PA Dad, ever the strate- gizer, decided it was time to prearrange fu- neral plans for himself and my mother. On his way out the door to the your funny story about friends or family could be worth $$$. For details, go to page 2 or rd.com/submit. funeral home, he asked if she wanted to come along. “You can pick out your own casket that way,” he explained excitedly. Mom, who wasn’t as gung-ho about the project, replied, “No. You do it. I want to be surprised.” —Ken Wendle Alton, IL HE WRITES IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS You can’t say God doesn’t have a sense of humor after reading these signs found outside churches: ) “Lord, help us to be the people our dogs think we are.” ) “Forgive your enemies—it messes with their heads.” ) “Live your life well so we don’t have to lie at your funeral.” ) “Cremation is your last chance for a smoking-hot body.” ) “Acting perfect in church is like dress- ing up for an X-ray.” —boredpanda.com JUST LOVE EVERYONE. I’LL SORT ’EM OUT LATER. —GOD reader ’ s digest World of Good 12   August/september 2026  |  reAdersdigest.com.Au