What better place to look for exercise-avoidance wisecracks than the ultimate couch potato forum, Twitter? Have at it, lazyboneses:

My favourite exercise is a combination of lunge and crunch. It’s called lunch. – Mike M (@mikeym00n)

Nice try, but I’ll believe a salad is “to die for” when a convict chooses one for his last meal. – Juicy Morsel (@juicymorsel)

If swimming is such a good way to stay in shape, explain whales. – Sarcasm (@TheFunnyTeens)

Do people who say “exercise helps me relax” know about not exercising? – Robin McCauley (@RobinMcCauley)

Diet plan specifics: 1. Create a new diet plan 2. Stick to it all morning 3. Celebrate at Burger King – Steve Olivas (@steveolivas)

My credit card was flagged by the fraud department because I ordered some fitness equipment online. Is that because they think I’m fat? – Simon Pegg (@simonpegg)

Source: Twitter
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